My Orthodox Family

Opening Prayer

In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.   Amen.

O Heavenly King, the Comforter, the Spirit of Truth
Who art everywhere and fillest all things.  
Treasury of Blessings, and Giver of Life:  
Come and abide in us, and cleanse us from every impurity,
And save our souls, O Good One.

Discussion Starter-Bridge

Tell the group that in this six-session unit you are going to look at some of the relationships in families. Say: The Bible, and the lives of our saints, give us many stories of relationships. Some of these relationships were healthy and good for the people in them, and some were not. We, in our own lives, also have a variety of family relationships. There are brothers with brothers, sisters with sisters, brothers with sisters, These sibling relationships are the ones we are going to look at today.

Continue by saying: Those of you who had siblings, either sisters or brothers, were given a special gift. Think for a moment about those sibling relationships, and share any special memories you would like to that involve a brother or sister. I’m going to put some words on the chalkboard that may bring some memories to mind.

Write on the chalkboard: rivalry, unique closeness, shared secrets, practical jokes, nicknames, family events. Wait a few minutes, and let people share their memories.
Go on to say: Some of us are fortunate enough to have someone who is not a blood brother or blood sister, but who is as close to us as a sibling. This may be a cousin or other relative, or it may be someone who is not part of our own biological family.

Ask participants to share any memories they have of such a relationship.

Bible Studies

1. Divide the class into two groups of 4-5, or into several groups if you have a good many participants.
   Assign each group the A or B Bible study below, and ask groups to be ready to report on their conclusions.
   
   Bible Study A
   Read together the story of Joseph and his brothers in Genesis 37: 1-28 and then Genesis 45: 1-15.
   This second reading tells of Joseph’s success in Egypt after his years of slavery. Talk about the following questions, and let participants give their own opinions. Some suggested answers are offered in italics:
   
   
2. How was Joseph able to heal the wound his brothers had inflicted on him? (One answer could be that he was able to see God’s purpose in what happened.) How might his example help us do the same?
   
   

• Parents often have a strong effect on their children’s sibling relationships. How do you think Joseph’s relationship with his brothers was affected by their father’s behavior? (Making Joseph such an obvious favorite was bound to stir up resentment in the others.) How would you advise parents to avoid the same mistake?
  
  

1. Bible Study B
   Read together the story of Jacob and Esau in Genesis 25: 28-34 & 27: 1-29.
   After Jacob so disgracefully cheated his brother, many years went by. Jacob had an unusual experience, and then had another encounter with Esau.
   
   Read Genesis 32: 22-33:11 and then talk about these questions:
   
   
2. What experience did Jacob have that made him willing to humble himself before Esau?
   (His encounter with the angel had changed him, and made him a more godly person. )
   
   

• What does the encounter between the brothers tell us about Esau’s character?
  (The encounter between the brothers shows that Esau was basically a good, forgiving person. He may have been foolish in letting himself be duped into giving up his birthright for a bowl of food, but he was not a hard person who held a grudge after all the years of Jacob’s absence.)
  
  
• Parents often strongly influence the relationships between their children. How do you think Rebekah’s treatment of Jacob influenced his relationship with Esau? (Her obvious favoritism was not healthy for either brother, especially when she encouraged Jacob to follow his worst instincts and cheat Esau.) How would you advise parents to avoid the same mistake?

Give the groups time to finish their studies, and then let them report.

Wrap up

• Why does Jesus use the word “brother” here, rather than “friend” or “neighbor” or some other word?

Closing Prayer

Opening Prayer

In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.   Amen.

O Heavenly King, the Comforter, the Spirit of Truth
Who art everywhere and fillest all things.  
Treasury of Blessings, and Giver of Life:  
Come and abide in us, and cleanse us from every impurity,
And save our souls, O Good One.

Planning Time

Discussion Starter-Bridge

Bible Studies

Divide the class into groups of 3 or 4, and assign each group Bible Study A or Bible Study B. Ask groups to be ready to report on their conclusions.

Bible Study A
Read together 2 Timothy 1:5 and 3: 15. Talk together about these questions:

• In what way did Timothy’s mother co-operate with God?
• What co-operation do you see among the members of Timothy’s family? (Obviously both mother and grandmother taught him the faith, and taught him to take responsibility for it)
• Do you see any ways in which Eunice and Lois’ co-operation with God might have affected their family life in a costly way? (They would miss Timothy’s company after he went to work with Paul, and might worry about his safety in the new and sometimes hostile places he was going to visit. Yet they must have been proud that Paul thought so highly of their beloved boy.)

• In what way did Jairus co-operate with God?
• What difficulties might he have faced in doing so? (Others were clearly discouraging him from calling on Jesus Christ, and their unbelief even reached the point of laughing at Christ.)
• How did God use Jairus’ co-operation to bring about something unexpected? (Obviously, the raising of the little girl was a new and unexpected experience for those who were so cynical as to laugh.)
• How did God’s action affect Jairus’ family? (Feeling that they had lost their little daughter they of course were delighted to have her back. Jairus’ faith and his willingness to co-operate with God by entrusting his daughter to Jesus saved her life.)

Closing Prayer

O Lord, grant our brothers and sisters health, peace, love, long life and Thy holy grace so that they may follow Thy holy paths and do all that pleases Thee. Grant that we may spend our days in peace and love, for what is better or more beautiful than for all to live together as brothers and sisters? Hear our prayer, and have mercy on us, for Thou art merciful and lovest mankind, and to Thee we send up glory, to the Father and to the Son and to the Holy Spirit, now and forever and unto ages of ages. Amen. (Adapted from Orthodox Prayer Book, published by Holy Protection Orthodox Monastery, Fort Qu’appelle, Saskatchewan, Canada, 1990.)

Opening Prayer

In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.   Amen.

O Heavenly King, the Comforter, the Spirit of Truth
Who art everywhere and fillest all things.  
Treasury of Blessings, and Giver of Life:  
Come and abide in us, and cleanse us from every impurity,
And save our souls, O Good One.

Planning Time

Discussion Starter-Bridge

Bible and Saints Study

Read the following stories together, in whatever way you wish—aloud with readers taking turns, or with people reading silently and then talking about what they read. Have Bibles on hand so you can look up the passages referred to.

The Herods: Generations of Enemies of the Faith

The generations of rulers we call the Herods or Herodians didn’t lack intellectual ability. They were smart and able people, in fact. There were many generations in the family, but the three that we will look at are those who played a notable part in New Testament history.

The first of these three Herods was called “the Great.” He would destroy anyone he considered to be a threat to his power, which is why he is remembered for the “murder of the innocents” described in Matthew 2: 16-18. He also killed some of his own sons. Yet the possibilities of real greatness were there: he was a builder of great vision, his crowning achievement being the Temple in Jerusalem. He was also a statesman of sufficient diplomacy to impress Mark Anthony, Augustus, and many others.

Herod Antipas was the son of Herod the Great. There must have been a longing for God deep inside the man: Saint Mark tells us that when Herod heard John the Forerunner speak, “he was much perplexed, and yet he heard him gladly.” Saint Mark says also that though Herodias had a grudge against John and wanted him killed, Herod “feared John, knowing he was a righteous and holy man, and kept him safe” (Mark 6: 19-20.)

Herod Antipas’ lust had been stronger than he was, and he had taken his brother Philip’s wife Herodias, a fact which John could not ignore and against which he bravely spoke out. Perhaps if Herod had been a stronger man in many ways, things would have been different. But Herodias’ “grudge” against John only grew, and in the famous scene of her daughter dancing before Herod, the king’s lust and weakness combined with her cunning to overwhelm him. She extracted a promise from him, knowing that he had at least enough integrity to keep a promise made to her. Then she demanded John’s death, to which Herod reluctantly agreed.

Herod Antipas also interrogated Jesus Christ when He was arrested. On that occasion, too, he showed at least a superficial interest in the faith. Luke’s Gospel says that Herod “had long desired to see [Jesus], because he had heard about him, and was hoping to see some sign done by him” (Luke 23: 8.) But without a “good show” on Jesus’ part, Herod’s interest waned. He reverted to mockery and contempt in questioning Jesus, and soon sent him back to Pilate.

The third Herod, known as Herod Agrippa, was the grandson of Herod the Great. The family failing of pride really overcame this man, and no doubt gaining the favor of the self-worshipping emperor Caligula only increased his dangerous tendencies. He actually allowed people to hail him as a god.

We read that when he did this, an angel of the Lord immediately smote him because he did not “give God the glory” and he died a gruesome death (Acts 12: 21-23.) Like the other Herodian rulers before him, he ignored or suppressed his knowledge of the Jewish faith, and paid the price for forgetting his place as one of God’s created beings.
Herod Agrippa’s youngest daughter carried on the unfortunate traditions of her family. Drusilla left her Jewish husband to marry Felix, the Roman governor. This was illegal both because her first husband was still alive, and also because Felix did not profess the faith of the Jews.

But Felix and Drusilla’s great sin was caused by the same fear that Herod and Herodias had felt in the presence of John the Forerunner. For Drusilla and Felix, Saint Paul’s words about the Christ, and the judgment to come, were conscience-searing. They did nothing to spare the great apostle his unjust trial and death. Like her older male relatives, Drusilla cast aside the faith she had been born to, and silenced her own conscience as well as any person who dared to question her way of life.

A Large and Saintly Family

The emperor Diocletian was one of the fiercest persecutors of Christians ever to sit on the Roman throne. During the time of his power, the grandparents of St. Gregory of Nyssa, St. Basil the great, and their sister St. Macrina fled to the mountainous regions of Pontus. They lived a rugged life full of hardship, and when they returned to their home, their money was gone and their health was undermined. The husband died during this time, but his wife Macrina was to live a long life. Later her married son Basil also died fairly young, leaving ten children to the care of their grandmother and their mother, Emilia. These ten children would form an extraordinary group of saints.

The eldest child, also named Macrina, was the great model and teacher for her younger brother Gregory, who wrote about her life. He says that from her earliest years she taught the psalms, so that “when she awoke from sleep, or was about to commence any work, or when she went to sleep, the words of David were on her lips, as a good companion.”
Some years later, Macrina was espoused to a man who died early. After that, she considered herself to be married and would never consider another man. She took care of her mother, the household full of younger children, and all the concerns of taxes, maintenance, and business. But little by little, Macrina brought the rest of the family into a simple, monastic way of living. Her mother was gradually influenced by her daughter’s example, and the household evolved into a place where the family and their former servants lived on a completely equal footing, eating the same simple food, wearing plain clothing, and praying together.

When younger brother Basil came home from school, quite full of himself and his acquired knowledge and worldly ways, his family’s example led him also to change. He began working with his hands and living in poverty, still pursuing knowledge but with far less pride and far more dependence on God as the source of all true knowledge.
Navcratios, another brother, decided to give up everything he owned and went into the thick forest near the River Iris with a companion. The two young men devoted themselves to prayer, vigil, and fasting. They fed themselves by fishing in the river, and took care of some old, sick men who lived nearby. Navcratios died suddenly after only five years of his life in the forest. But though the family grieved deeply for their beloved son and brother, they were not overcome by grief because of their faith. Gregory writes that their mother did not “wail, rend her clothing, or lament with funeral dirges.”

Peter, another brother, became adept at work with his hands and well-versed in science. But he, too, sought the life of an ascetic and he, too, helped others. When a severe famine struck the land, Peter was able to supply food to crowds of people.

In the next several years, both Emilia and Basil died. Gregory writes admiringly of how his sister Macrina took these terrible blows:

 Macrina herself would die a few years later. But she and her brothers, guided by the example of their parents and grandparents, left the Church a wonderful legacy of holiness and scholarship. They were a family that continually blessed God, and were blessed by Him.

• What do you think were some of the differences in “atmosphere” and “attitude” in the homes of the Herodians and that of the saints in the second story?
  Probably the teaching of simple humility before God had much to do with the difference, since other things were similar in the households—members of both families were intelligent and educated, and knew or had known worldly prosperity.
  
  

Discussion

Activity

• As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. (Joshua 24: 15.)
• Because you have made the Lord your refuge, the Most High your habitation, no evil shall befall you, no scourge come near your dwelling. (Psalm 91: 9-10.)
• In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths. (Proverbs 3:6.)
• Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established. (Proverbs 16: 3.)
  

Closing Prayer

O Lord, grant our brothers and sisters health, peace, love, long life and Thy holy grace so that they may follow Thy holy paths and do all that pleases Thee. Grant that we may spend our days in peace and love, for what is better or more beautiful than for all to live together as brothers and sisters? Hear our prayer, and have mercy on us, for Thou art merciful and lovest mankind, and to Thee we send up glory, to the Father and to the Son and to the Holy Spirit, now and forever and unto ages of ages. Amen. (Adapted from Orthodox Prayer Book, published by Holy Protection Orthodox Monastery, Fort Qu’appelle, Saskatchewan, Canada, 1990.)

Opening Prayer

In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.   Amen.

O Heavenly King, the Comforter, the Spirit of Truth
Who art everywhere and fillest all things.  
Treasury of Blessings, and Giver of Life:  
Come and abide in us, and cleanse us from every impurity,
And save our souls, O Good One.

Planning Time

Discussion Starter-Bridge

• If we are thinking of how to bring new life to our parish by attracting, inviting, and welcoming new people, how could these words help us? How would a parish in which Paul’s words were put into practice be attractive to people searching for a church home?
  

Bible Studies

Closing Prayer

O Lord, grant our brothers and sisters health, peace, love, long life and Thy holy grace so that they may follow Thy holy paths and do all that pleases Thee. Grant that we may spend our days in peace and love, for what is better or more beautiful than for all to live together as brothers and sisters? Hear our prayer, and have mercy on us, for Thou art merciful and lovest mankind, and to Thee we send up glory, to the Father and to the Son and to the Holy Spirit, now and forever and unto ages of ages. Amen. (Adapted from Orthodox Prayer Book, published by Holy Protection Orthodox Monastery, Fort Qu’appelle, Saskatchewan, Canada, 1990.)

Opening Prayer

In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.   Amen.

O Heavenly King, the Comforter, the Spirit of Truth
Who art everywhere and fillest all things.  
Treasury of Blessings, and Giver of Life:  
Come and abide in us, and cleanse us from every impurity,
And save our souls, O Good One.

Planning Time

Bible Studies

Read together: Mark 2: 13-14, John 4: 7, and Luke 19: 1-10. Discuss: Why might each of these people been hard for others to accept as a “neighbor” or “member of Christ’s family”? (Tax collectors like Matthew were hated; a Jew would never normally drink from the cup of a Samaritan and more specifically a Samaritan woman because the Samaritans were not pure; Zacchaeus was a known cheater.)

Jesus calls us always to broaden our love, to include more people in it, and to expand our personal definitions of “neighbor” and “family.”

1. Read together the story of St. Euphrosynos the Cook. Discuss:
2. Why might the other monks have been surprised to learn that St. Euphrosynos held such a prominent place in the Lord’s “family?” (To them he was an unimportant menial worker, not articulate or well-educated.)
   
   

• What does this tell us about how we are called to treat our neighbor? (It’s easy to forget that Jesus Christ often gave special attention to “unimportant” people. He wants us to love them as He did.)

In the time of Patriarch John the Merciful, a young monk arrived in the city of Alexandria. He immediately made a list of all the prostitutes in the city. He spent his days practicing a peculir kind of asceticism, hiring himself out for the most backbreaking labor.

At night he would visit a brothel, give the money he had earned during the day to one of the prostitutes, and then shut himself in with her. As soon as the door closed behind them, Vitalis would beg the young woman to lie down and have a good night’s sleep, while he spent the entire night in a corner of the room, praying to God for her. He visited a different prostitute every night, till he had gone through the whole list, and then he started over again with the first woman whose name he had written down.

His counsel and loving concern caused many of the women to give up their way of life. Some married, some went to monasteries, and some found an honorable means of making a living. But all of them were forbidden by Vitalis to tell anyone what he did when he visited them.

Soon the young monk, therefore, became a scandal to the whole city of Alexandria. He was spat on, hit, and called names in the street. But he bore it all with patience.
When Vitalis died, his deeds became known. Miraculous healings took place over his grave, and many people brought their sick to be healed.

 -- Information taken from The Prologue from Ochrid, Vol. 2

• How would most of us feel toward Vitalis if we saw him in the streets of Alexandria, not knowing what he really did at night? Would he be someone we would welcome as a neighbor or as part of our Christian family?
  
• How might Vitalis’ actions have affected the attitude of the prostitutes toward Jesus Christ?

Wrap up

Closing Prayer

Opening Prayer

In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.   Amen.

O Heavenly King, the Comforter, the Spirit of Truth
Who art everywhere and fillest all things.  
Treasury of Blessings, and Giver of Life:  
Come and abide in us, and cleanse us from every impurity,
And save our souls, O Good One.

Saints' Study

Say to the group:
In an earlier session we talked about Jesus Christ’s use of the work “brother.” And as far back as Genesis the question was raised, “Am I my brother’s keeper?” (Genesis:9).

• So what does it mean to be accountable to God for our own lives, and also for the live of those around us?
  
• What does it mean to be our brothers’ keeper?
  Let’s look at the lives of five saints who took responsibility for their own lives, and the lives of those around them, in very different ways.

Read the lives of the five saints included in the lesson's resources listed above. Discuss the following questions about each saint. Suggested answers follow, but the group may come up with others:

• St. Juliana: What did she have to give up to do God’s will?
  She gave up her own desire to enter a monastery. She was accountable to God for what He had called her to do, and for the welfare of her family as well as many needy neighbors.
  
• St. Nina
  How was she accountable to God, and for the lives of others?
  When she knew that the Georgian people did not have the Christian faith, she felt responsible for showing it to them so that they could achieve salvation. She gave up her own homeland to do so.
  
• St. Elizabeth the New Martyr
  What did she give up to be accountable to God?
  She gave up her high rank, and finally her very life, which she knew was in danger in the revolutionary years in Russia. Through her charitable works she took responsibility for the lives around her. She also took responsibility specifically for the man who assassinated her husband by forgiving him and encouraging him to seek God’s forgiveness.
  
• St. Simeon the Stylite
  What did he give up to be accountable to God, and for the lives of others?
  We might say that he gave up “normal” life by sitting on a pillar. This is certainly true, but having separated himself so dramatically from normal life, he also became a counselor and advisor to many. This obliged him to give up much of the time of solitary prayer that he loved so much. In doing so, he took responsibility for the lives of those who needed his counsel and spiritual advice.
  
  
• St. Romanus the Melodist
  How did this saint take responsibility for the lives of others?
  St. Romanus may not have known how his music would affect others in later centuries. But the fact is that many people who were imprisoned or suffered for their faith were comforted by singing Romanus’ music from memory when they could not worship openly. He therefore is responsible for helping many, and not only those who heard his beautiful hymns when he wrote them.
  

Wrap up

Closing Prayer

O Lord, grant our brothers and sisters health, peace, love, long life and Thy holy grace so that they may follow Thy holy paths and do all that pleases Thee. Grant that we may spend our days in peace and love, for what is better or more beautiful than for all to live together as brothers and sisters? Hear our prayer, and have mercy on us, for Thou art merciful and lovest mankind, and to Thee we send up glory, to the Father and to the Son and to the Holy Spirit, now and forever and unto ages of ages. Amen. (Adapted from Orthodox Prayer Book, published by Holy Protection Orthodox Monastery, Fort Qu’appelle, Saskatchewan, Canada, 1990.)